The Official RAZZIE® Forum : 2011 FORUMS, ALPHABETICALLY by TITLE: Our Take on ABDUCTION

Author: HeadRAZZBerry
Subject: Ye Olde Head RAZZ's Rap on ABDUCTION...
Posted: September 19 2011 at 9:39am

IF THERE WERE SUCH a THING as a "MALE PIN-UP" (and WHO AM I TO SAY THERE ISN'T?) THAT WOULD BE a PERFECT DESCRIPTION of 2-TIME RAZZIE® NOMINEE TAYLOR LAUTNER -- an ALMOST TALENT-FREE YOUNG MAN WHO HAPPENS to LOOK GOOD WITH HIS SHIRT OFF, ESPECIALLY in POSTERS INTENDED for the BEDROOM WALLS of 13-YEAR-OLD GIRLS.

BUT MERELY BEING GOOD-LOOKING IS NOT ENOUGH REASON to BE GIVEN a STARRING ROLE in a MOTION PICTURE -- EVEN SO FORMULAIC and PREDICTABLE a MOVE AS ABDUCTION (WHICH MAY HAVE BEEN CONCOCTED SPECIFICALLY to SHOWCASE LAUTNER's SUPPOSED "TALENTS"). APPARENTLY an HONORS GRADUATE of the "TABULA RASA" SCHOOL of ACTING, LAUTNER FREQUENTLY HAS a LOOK on HIS FACE LIKE HE's THINKING MORE ABOUT REMEMBERING to HIT HIS MARKS THAN TRYING to REMEMBER (LET ALONE CONVINCINGLY DELIVER) HIS DIALOGUE LINES. TO CALL LAUTNER "INADEQUATE" AS an ACTOR IS an ALMOST COMICAL UNDERSTATEMENT.

CONTINUING THIS YEAR's TREND of REPUTABLE ACTORS TAKING MINOR ROLES in LESS-THAN-REPUTABLE FILMS, LAUTNER IS JOINED HERE by SPIDER MAN 2's "DOC OC," ALFRED MOLINA and, OF ALL PEOPLE, 3-TIME OSCAR® NOMINEE SIGNOURNEY WEAVER(!). THE ONE POSSIBLE SAVING GRACE WAS THAT the WHOLE THING WAS HELMED by the CAPABLE (BUT RECENTLY UNDER-EMPLOYED) JOHN SINGLETON -- WHO SADLY FAILS to DELIVER HERE, and MAY BE UP for WORST DIRECTOR.

CLEARLY "ONE of OURS" RATHER THAN SOMETHING of INTEREST to ANY of THOSE "BEST" AWARDz SHOWS, THIS IS ONE SO-CALLED "THRILLER" THAT SHOULD THRILL NO ONE --INCLUDING THOSE SCREAMING 13-YEAR-OLD GIRLS for WHOM IT WAS SO OBVIOUSLY MADE...

IF YOU WANNA JOIN OUR FORUM DISCUSSION of THIS FILM, HERE's the LINK to DO SO...

LAUTNER: "But, Mister Director, sir -- I'm confused!

Why am I wearing a t-shirt promoting a Johnny Depp

franchise instead of appearing shirtless like my contract

stipulates I do in every movie I make??"

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