First of all, before I go on any further on how I wish I had been run over by Will Ferrell in a 18 wheeler semi filled to the brim with un-brought copies of "Land of the Lost" rather than watching "Bucky Larson" (What I do for you John!) I want to compliment John and the rest of the Razzie staff for such a great job they did with the Razzie final nominee ballot press release. It had the usual style and grace which both I and my son have grown accustomed to in the last 5 years with watching the Razzie Award show at which we will be in attendance on April 1^st. One Last highlight I would like to share is meeting Chip Dornell whom we met while we were in line waiting to go in for the press release at MAGICOPOLIS and his handling of a Japan Tourist who wanted to know what was going on inside MAGICOPOLIS and what a Razzie was. If it was not for Chip translating what our tourist friend from Tokyo was saying the rest of us in line would have no idea what he was talking about. Anyways, enough stalling and on to the review which I can with a clear conscience say this was the worst movie I have seen in my life.

After leaving the press release both my son and I had both seen Jack and Jill (which by the way was an Academy Award winner compared to this home made trash heap) and had not yet seen Bucky, so the next evening we rented it from Red Box so we could fairly evaluated it for the final ballot. So we got our Del Taco at the ready and put the DVD in the Blu-ray player on my big screen and proceeded to watch.

What was clearly the 1^st sign of what direction “Bucky” was heading into is when we saw an inbreed farmer (probably left over from Deliverance) smack peanut butter all over his Junk so his goat could “snack” on it, this was still in the middle of the intro credits before we even get to Bucky himself. Once the Peanut Butter and Goat credits finally ended we see Bucky at his job as a grocery sacker at “Fooders” where his boss played by Curtis Armstrong (AKA Booger) fires poor Bucky (Not clear why but it does not really matter anyways). I’ll skip over the dinner seen with Bucky’s Parents and get to where Bucky goes to his friends house to watch a new movie. The movie that Bucky watches (And at the same time masturbates to) is a 1970’s porno of his parents. At this point Bucky realizes his destiny and decides to go to Hollywood to be a porn star. The rest of this you will have to rent from Red Box and experience the holocaust yourself, I can’t bring myself to type anymore. I’m having violent flashbacks as it is with the little I managed to hammer out. Please GOD, Strike down these unholy images from my brain! Take me to my special place where I may forget.

My first thoughts was to trash both my TV and Blu-Ray player so I could sanctify my entertainment system but came to my senses in time before I had found my sons metal bat in the garage. Upon returning “Bucky” back to the Red Box Kiosk I hesitated briefly because I was afraid the machine would abruptly catch fire after inserting Bucky back into it, luckily it went without incident.

I never truly recognized how bad the economy had gotten until watching Bucky, seeing good actors like Don Johnson, Christina Ricci, Stephen Doriff, Jimmy Fallen, and Pauly Shore (Yes I said Pauly Shore, Bio-Dome was a park walk with what Nick Swardson did) give up what integrity they may have had to actually use their real names with this movie.

To Top it all off Nick Swardson actually defends is big ZERO achievement with the following statement in a October 2011 interview, in which he blamed its poor financial showing on the difficulties of advertising the material: "To promote an R-rated movie, with commercials, with this character, it was just really, really hard. It was hard to get the movie across to people. The trailer in theaters was really tame because we couldn't show any of the insanity, and even if we did it, it wouldn't hit because it had no context. It was just really frustrating." He predicted the film would find more appreciation on DVD. The Dunderhead then continued by dismissing the negative reviews saying. "I knew the critics were going to bury us ... None of those reviewers was psyched to see Bucky Larson and laugh. They go in with the mentality 'f**k these guys for making another movie.' They go in there to kind of headhunt. It makes me laugh because it's just so embarrassing. It makes them look like such morons." I just keep thinking of Nick’s “Moron” comment and remembering the old saying “don’t throw stones in glass houses”, for further reference check out this link at the Wikipedia site.

The really sad thing my son who is an Adam Sandler fan (as myself) is hoping that Adam just put his name on the script and can have plausible deniability that he had any “creative input” concerning this abomination. Before anybody says anything we are not defending the stuff that Adam has put out over the years but you can usually get a laugh even if it was unintentional. This cannot be said for this unholy horror. I’m just hoping after this Adam Sandler revives Rob Schneider’s mediocre career, it will be a welcome site after seeing Nick’s first starring role.

Since Bucky Larson is SO bad, it gets a "9 Worst Things" review. Before I start ripping into this, here's the two things about this that I sorta "liked": Stephen Dorff and Kevin Nealon. Dorff is decent as a douchey porn king and Nealon is responsible for the only three laughes in the movie: "f*ckin' John Mayer", "that's just my intern", and "did you eat my grapes?"

This is my top front-runner for Worst Picture...  

Hey, with Sandler being involved in FOUR Razzie worthy movies this year, I'm sure we'll squeeze him in somehow. 

Man, you know your movie sucks when Pauly Shore comes off the best!

So you're saying that the same people who champion Sandler's movies are also the kind of people who eat, sleep, and breathe NASCAR?

Keep in mind that people who go to Sandler movies and actually like them also go home and admire the black velvet paintings of Elvis on their trailer walls.  

 

And for the record, I championed the cause of Strange Wilderness on this board. Unfortunately, almost no one saw it. I may be one of a very small minority of people on this planet that actually suffered through both Strange Wilderness and A Sound of Thunder.

Also, I feel really proud that movie-goers rejected this! Maybe, this'll make Sandler realize he has to put in effort to get money. Just Go With It may have been a huge hit*, but Zookeeper disappointed and I hope that movie-goers will reject Jack And Jill as well!