Yes.  There's enough nuclear bombs to kill off the world several times over.  One problem, though.  The radiation will kill Alice.

 

 

That's a problem lately.  Instead of the Razzie-nominated movies that are laughably bad, most of the movies have been just plain bad.  It's hard to slog through a movie that's just plain bad.

 

 

Let's start with a brief smattering of the things that didn't suck. Keven Durand's great as Barry Burton, the scenes with Las Plagas are good, and Bingbing Li is good as Ada Wong.

 

The special effects are still sucky, but I'm at peace with them now. The special effects are the least of the film's many problems. One of the film's "hooks" is that several previously dead characters like Carlos, Rain (Michelle Rodriguez), and One are back as clones. Don't remember the last one? He was the black guy he got cut up by the laser grid near the start of the first one. Other than Rain, the clones have no character whatsoever. The only thing seperating them from regular mooks is that they're played by familiar faces. It's nothing more than a shameless attempt to get more butts in seats without doing anything.

 

Do you need to be told that Milla Jovovich can't act? Didn't think so. Despite his helicopter getting blown up in the last one, Shawn Roberts is back as Wesker. He has about seven minutes of combined screentime, but still manages to leave an ugly impression. Also, he was given a Heel Face Turn and now he's a good guy. Yes, Worthless Sh*t Anderson made one of the best villains in video game history a good guy. But, the worst thing about the movie is... Sienna Guillery? When I heard that the best part of the Resident Evil series was coming back I was excited as Hell. But, no. Her performance is worse than Jovovich's by a good county. In this film, she's brainwashed by Umbrella to fight against Alice and I don't give a crap anymore.

 

I could go into detail about how terrible Worthless Sh*t is, but you can probably guess how bad his writing and directing is. So, instead, here's the Razzie nods that I think this film should get. Worst Actress for Jovovich, Worst Supporting Actor for Roberts, Worst Supporting Actress for Guillery, and Worst Prequel, Remake, Rip-off, Or Sequel.

 

It could be argued that the film I'm reviewing tomorrow isn't a horror movie, but it was too obvious a target to pass up. Grade: D-

 

Next-up: The Number 23!!!!!

I was talking about RE4, not RE5. If you're suggesting I watch RE4, so I can watch RE5 just to say what was so bad about RE5...I might have to pass.

And it's the longest, running almost 2 hours! I stopped RE4 within 10 minutes because the slow-mo annoyed the hell out of me.

I thought each film had already "gone global." How much more global can you go?!

Why is this? Is it because it looks more like a Michael Bay film rather than a true survival-horror game?

 

To moviewizguy: I heard a rumor that the 6th one is planned to be the last. Even then, one who avoided these films at all costs can't predict if Milla will even succeed.

 

On topic: If this dodges any 2012 RAZZIE nominations, I'll be fine... for a while. That neutrality will end if the unknown 6th Resident Evil film either gets exonerated in the reviews or dodges RAZZIE nominations as well. But I doubt that'll happen until September of 2014.

 

The only thing more regrettable? Some people believe the Resident Evil series of videogames is drawing further past its prime. Screwattack.com says the 10th worst mistake made by Capcom up to this month is supplanting too many of the horror elements with action!

 

Also, wanna ask. Is Stolen also being considered? That's the movie with Nicolas Cage directed by the same guy who directed Expendables 2 that seems to be ripping-off Taken.