The Official RAZZIE® Forum : Official RAZZIE® Take on SMURFS 3-D

Author: HeadRAZZBerry
Subject: Ye Olde Head RAZZberry's Rant...
Posted: July 25 2011 at 9:10am

WHEN IT COMES to OBNOXIOUS "KID FRIENDLY" CARTOONS from the 1970s, ONLY THE CARE BEARS CAN COMPETE with SMURFS for the TITLE of BERRY MOST OBNOXIOUS. A SPECIES of TINY BLUE CREATURES SO CUTE THEY MAKE the MUNCHKINS in THE WIZARD OF OZ LOOK LIKE SOMETHING from a SAW MOVIE, SMURFS GOT the FULL-ON, BIG SCREEN, 3-D TREATMENT BECAUSE...SOMEONE THOUGHT THEY COULD MAKE BIG BUX DOING IT.

WE SINCERELY HOPED WHOEVER THOUGHT THIS WOULD BE a MONEY-MAKER WOULD BE WRONG, and/or THAT THEY WILL BURN in HOLLYWOOD HELL for INFLICTING SOMETHING THIS NOXIOUS on the PAYING PUBLIC. THE BLAME for SMURFS REACHING THEATRE SCREENS CAN BE SQUARELY PLACED at the FEET of the TWO INEXPLICABLY SUCCESSFUL ALVIN MOVIES (BOTH of WHICH WERE LISTED in VARIOUS PLACES on PREVIOUS RAZZIE® NOMINATING BALLOTS): THEIR SUCCESS HAS UNLEASHED a TORRENT of MEDIOCRE 1960s and 1970s KIDDIE CARTOON SERIES BEING ADAPTED to the BIG SCREEN (WITH the AFORE-MENTIONED CARE BEARS ALSO on THEIR WAY to BEING REVIVED).

AND, LIKE the TRANNIES MOVIES and OTHER CURRENT FRANCHISES, SMURFS HAVE ENDLESS "SYNERGISTIC" OPPORTUNITIES AS WELL -- TOYS, CLOTHING, TCHOCHKIES and CETERA.

HERE's HOPING THAT, LIKE the TIE-INS for MANY A FAILED FILM, ALL THAT SUPERFLUOUS SMURFS CRAP WINDS UP in the TWO-for-99 BINS at 99 CENTS ONLY.

WANNA GIVE the LITTLE BLUE DEARIES a SWIFT, WELL-PLACED KICK (and a BAD CASE of BLUE BALLS) YERSELF??

HERE's the LINK to DO SO...

WHAT's NEXT -- AN ENTIRE MOVIE BASED on THOSE

HIDEOUS 1960s TROLL DOLLS??

OH, OH -- SHOULDN'TA SAID THAT...

]]>