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A Great, Big, Hairy DOG of a Movie?!?!?

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BurnHollywoodBurn View Drop Down
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    Posted: February 13 2010 at 5:12am
I've also heard or read that Del Toro and Hopkins pretty much sleep walk through their dialongue. Like they were totally in this for the pay check and half assed their way right through it.
The Four Horsemen of the Moviepocalypse: uncalled for sequels/remakes/reboots, 3-D surcharges, untalented "celebrities", and anything with Michael Bay's name attached to it.
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Post Options Post Options   Quote Inselaffe Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: February 14 2010 at 5:05am
Well, I didn't actually think it was THAT bad, but it wasn't good either, I'm not a fan of SIR Anthony Hopkins at the best of time, and he more or less re-did his Van Helsing role. Unfortunately I saw it in German, so can't comment on how their delivery was, but I thought Del Toro did a fair job, and he did remind me of Lon Chaney. It's all over the place though, and I thought there was too much blood and guts thrown in just to gore it up, where it was totally unnecessary, as were several scenes, the entire London part was just there to fill space, and for the nod to American Werewolf in London. The moon changed sides during one scene, that was kind of daft, don't they have people to watch out for that kind of thing? Shame though, I'm a great fan of werewolf films, so when I heard about this I was well up for it, especially with Benicio Del Toro. Never mind eh?
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Post Options Post Options   Quote BurnHollywoodBurn Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: February 14 2010 at 11:14am
Originally posted by Berrynoia

Taylor Swift:  Just wait until we get her in a Supergirl remake **shudders**
Oh lord! You just gave me this horrible mental image of Supergirl flying over a city while playing a guitar and singing pop-country fusion songs! (Hits himself in the head to try to get the image out!) While we're at it, why not have Kayne West as the main villain and at one point he yells "Sorry Supergirl, but I should be fighting a REAL superheroine, like Wonder Woman (played by Beyonce, of course ... shudders even more).
The Four Horsemen of the Moviepocalypse: uncalled for sequels/remakes/reboots, 3-D surcharges, untalented "celebrities", and anything with Michael Bay's name attached to it.
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Post Options Post Options   Quote cvcjr13 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: February 14 2010 at 5:11pm
In no way is The Wolfman as hilariously bad as that Captain America movie where the good Captain is running up the stairs hiding behind his little toy shield.
 
As for a date movie, don't see Valentine's Day or The Wolfman.  Go see The Blind Side, or even better, rent a classic movie and stay home.
 
However, that doesn't mean The Wolfman isn't so stupid in places as to be funny.
 
For example, the most stupid scene in the movie is:
 
MAJOR SPOILER ALERT
 
I mean, imagine a London psychologist, who I shall call head doofus, subjects Benicio Del Toro to repeated torture and hallucinogenic drugs, and then manages to present him to a room of fellow psychologists on the night of a full moon so they can together watch Del Toro realize that he is not a lycanthrope. 
 
Mind you, if I were subjected to all that, I would hope to turn into a werewolf, too.  But that's beside the point.
 
As Del Toro transmogrifies at the appearance of the full moon, the doctors all get up as any sane man would and immediately leave. . . . No, that's not what happened.  They all demonstrated why their possible deaths would improve psychology for a hundred years by wasting time trying to get the head doofus to turn around and see what was going on.  Head doofus showed more intelligence after he FINALLY turns around, and immediately pulls himself up and over the rail and heads for the door where he opens it and goes out. . . . No, that's not what happened.  The door is, as cliched as it sounds, locked, so he pulls out the cliched key ring with a bazillion keys and doesn't know which one opens the door, and then argues with a dumb-as-stone janitor about opening the door, giving Del Toro de Lycanthrope time enough to defenestrate head doofus, who meets his cliche end impaled on the ironwork below.   And the other doctors have already exited the room through the double doors. . . . No, that's not what happened.  I couldn't see exactly what happened, but it seems the first doctors through the doors locked the doors behind them, trapping all the other doctors for the Wolfman to thrash if he wanted.  I mean, if that is actually what happened, it would be the only smart (even if vastly unethical) act of self-preservation demonstrated by anybody in the movie.   If it didn't happen that way, what a shame.   An opportunity lost. . . .
 
From Anthony Hopkins giving us his screen presence and little more, to Emily Blunt's cliched character of the fiancee of the late brother who falls in love with the next brother, to Del Toro, Hopkins, the late brother and the late mother not looking anything alike, to Hopkins killing his wife but for some reason sparing his son, to the faithful Indian servant who stays around despite knowing his boss' insanity, to the men traipsing about the woods late at night with no torches trying to shoot a beast who races at 30 mph and instead bumbling about in fear, shooting each other and providing plenty of excuses for gratuitous violence. . . .
 
And when you know a man becomes a wolfman one month after being wounded by another wolfman and survives, and you learn this from Hugo Weaving, and Weaving is standing there, in front of you, clearly wounded by the Wolfman, and your guns are loaded with silver bullets, why are you just standing around? . . .
 
But what is most hilarious is the line from the fortune teller from BloodRayne, er, a gypsy woman (yes, they have the cliched gypsy camp):  "It is a sin to kill a man, but it is not a sin to kill a beast.  But where does the beast end and the man begins?"  Just stop blabbering and kill the guy, will you? 
 
The next most hilarious is from Emily Blunt's Gwen, who says that if Del Toro is really a Wolfman, then everything is possible, like magic, God, Santa Claus and the tooth fairy (The Rock has already proven that to us, and I wish he hadn't. . . .).
 
And there's at least three flashbacks, and one point where Hopkins gives a very long exposition. . . .
 
Mind you, Anthony Hopkins sleepwalking through a script shows more talent than many actors, let alone many of our regular Razzie nominees, and Del Toro, Weaving and Blunt perform well beyond what the script deserves.  It's the quality of the acting that keeps this movie from causing me to split my sides with laughter and tolerate the onscreen lunacy (pun intended).  And this is what gives this movie its worst curse -- it is an extremely disappointing movie.  It could have easily been a classic for all time.  Rework the script to move from the stupid to the intelligent, rework the jump scares from the merely gratuitous to the fearful, treat the characters less like props and more like real beings, and deal cinematically with the issues of "giving into the beast" (I would have loved to hear a screaming all out dramatic argument between Hopkins and Del Toro over this, but instead we get the exposition). . . . we could have had such a great movie.
 
Instead, we have some gratuitous violence, some special effects and a wasted opportunity. 
 
Look for Hugo Weaving getting stuck with starring in a sequel no one wants.  When will Weaving be cast in an Oscar worthy role deserving of his talent?
 
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Post Options Post Options   Quote Headbanger14 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: February 17 2010 at 2:21pm
I don't think this movie is up for Remake Razzie. It's just another B-Movie based on yet another B-Movie. It's meant to be silly and stupid.
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Post Options Post Options   Quote saturnwatcher Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: February 17 2010 at 8:44pm
Originally posted by Inselaffe

. The moon changed sides during one scene, that was kind of daft, don't they have people to watch out for that kind of thing?
Continuity mistakes can be picked out in just about every movie, but some are so astonishingly laughable that they almost make otherwise unwatchable films worth sitting through. One of my personal favorites involves the most dreadful film made by the most ridiculously overrated actor in Hollywood history, John Wayne. The film in question is his kiss up fest with the Vietnam War, The Green Berets. The film ends with John and the little Vietnamese orphan, Wun Hung Lo or whatever his name was walking off toward a beautiful sunset on the South China Sea. Of course as anyone with a 5th grade grasp of geography is aware, that would mean the sun was setting in the east.
 
A similar mistake was made during the closing sequence of Jaws II. There are numerous other examples of laughable astronomical/geographic mistakes in filmdom, leading to the conclusion that there isn't a single person in Hollywood that could make it past the first 3 questions in Are You Smarter than a 5th Grader.
Nine times out of ten, in art as in life, there is no truth to be discovered, only an error to be exposed.--H.L. Menken
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Post Options Post Options   Quote Inselaffe Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: February 18 2010 at 1:38am
Sure there are continuity mistakes, as in almost every film. But what riles me is that, with all the effort and talented people, not to mention money, involved in making any film, turkey or not, these things still happen -- and blatantly so.  

The Green Berets, for example, was awful, no doubt about it, gung-ho bullsh*t to the hilt.
But I don't think Wolfman should be Razzie material -- it's not as bad as the likes of Showgirls, Swept Away, Battlefield Earth, and just generally anything Eddie Murphy has done since, say, the first Beverly Hills Cop.

On a different note, I don't suppose anyone knows if there's going to be some kind of video link so that those unfortunates among us who can't make it to this year's Razzie show can join in the fun online??  

RESPONSE from Head RAZZberry: First off, welcome to the Forum! Secondly, sorry to disappoint you, but no, as in years past, there will not be a Live Internet Feed of our show. At this point,we are near capacity on RSVPs for our March 6 show, but you might consider joining and planning to attend next year's 31st Annual RAZZIES. (at which WOLFMAN may, or may not, be a contender). Here (blatant plug) is the LINK to become a Voting Member...
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Post Options Post Options   Quote BurnHollywoodBurn Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: February 21 2010 at 6:42am
Originally posted by Inselaffe

Sure there are continuity mistakes, as in almost every film. But what riles me is that, with all the effort and talented people, not to mention money, involved in making any film, turkey or not, these things still happen -- and blatantly so.  
With all due respect, this is Hollywood, where millions of dollars are burned away like no one's business. With that much money on the line and hundreds of people's jobs on the line, you would think someone would overlook the final project and be able to point out any mistakes that made it through the cracks.
The Four Horsemen of the Moviepocalypse: uncalled for sequels/remakes/reboots, 3-D surcharges, untalented "celebrities", and anything with Michael Bay's name attached to it.
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Post Options Post Options   Quote Inselaffe Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: February 21 2010 at 6:48am
That's exactly my point. I can understand if some older films have gaffs, and indie films, but blockbusters costing millions of dollars? That I just don't get. But I guess it gives us something to laugh about.
If all goes well I'll try and make it over to LA next year for the awards, that would be something special! Shame about the video link, but you all have a great evening! 
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Post Options Post Options   Quote BurnHollywoodBurn Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: February 21 2010 at 5:18pm
The biggest disappoint is that the movie still goes by the stupid rule that a person will only turn into a werewolf if the moon is fully exposed for that person to see. The second the moon is blocked by clouds, boom, back into human form the werewolf goes. I really wish that was one aspect of werewolf mythology that would be laid to rest due to the sheer stupidity that we are made to believe the moon's effect can not work through clouds for whatever reason.
The Four Horsemen of the Moviepocalypse: uncalled for sequels/remakes/reboots, 3-D surcharges, untalented "celebrities", and anything with Michael Bay's name attached to it.
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Post Options Post Options   Quote Inselaffe Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 01 2010 at 1:43am
Sorry, been away. Quite right though, daft isn't it? Makes you wonder why so many werewolf films are based in England, what with all our dodgy weather, but come full moon night (like last night) the clouds part and off we go. 
Saw Alice last Thursday, no Razzie material there.
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Post Options Post Options   Quote BurnHollywoodBurn Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 01 2010 at 11:31am
Originally posted by Inselaffe

Sorry, been away. Quite right though, daft isn't it? Makes you wonder why so many werewolf films are based in England, what with all our dodgy weather, but come full moon night (like last night) the clouds part and off we go. 
I think it's just for the atomsphere and how the British are sterotype as being all well-spoken and proper, so it's only fitting to turn them in savage wolves and what not.
The Four Horsemen of the Moviepocalypse: uncalled for sequels/remakes/reboots, 3-D surcharges, untalented "celebrities", and anything with Michael Bay's name attached to it.
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Post Options Post Options   Quote Inselaffe Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 02 2010 at 5:10am
Nothing to do with our teeth then? 
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Post Options Post Options   Quote BurnHollywoodBurn Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 02 2010 at 11:59am
Originally posted by Inselaffe

Nothing to do with our teeth then? 
British people all have mouths full of nothing but sharp, canine fangs?
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Post Options Post Options   Quote PopcornAvenger Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 08 2010 at 7:39am
Yeah, this one's not razzie-worthy, agreed. It's bad, but not bad enough.
 
Burn, as far as "Hollywood Horror Movie Logic" goes, I stopped worrying about that since The Lost Boys (where they explained that if you invite a vampire into your house, he's completely immune to garlic, holy water, and all the other traditional methods of dealing with bloodsuckers).
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Post Options Post Options   Quote Vits Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 03 2010 at 4:27pm
Originally posted by Headbanger14

I don't think this movie is up for Remake Razzie. It's just another B-Movie based on yet another B-Movie. It's meant to be silly and stupid.
No,no,no.THE HAPENNIN'was a silly B-movie on purpose...that ended up bein'silly for real.
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