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Ashlee "Sings" -- God Help Us All!!

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HeadRAZZBerry View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Quote HeadRAZZBerry Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Topic: Ashlee "Sings" -- God Help Us All!!
    Posted: August 27 2005 at 2:06am

At last, something to challenge ALONE IN THE DARK as 2005's Worst Reviewed Movie! Ashlee Simpson making her screen debut in a drippy, sappy and anything-but-savvy story of Rock 'n' Roll Wanna-Be's. Based on its Box Office, apparently NO ONE but our Voting Members even bothered to see it!


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Post Options Post Options   Quote deadguy76 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: August 28 2005 at 8:45am
Try to convince me that Ashlee Simpson actually does her own singing...Yeah, RIGHT!!
"Woody Allen, whatever his failings, does not make movies for morons. Most directors do. Of course, most directors are morons."

- Joe Queenan

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Post Options Post Options   Quote BooBerry Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: August 28 2005 at 12:25pm

Well, well it seems that Ashlee Simpson will more than likely be going head to head with her sister Jessica Simpson in the Worst Supporting Actress category .

HeadRAZZBerry, you planning on listing both of them on the ballot? (Boy, I sure hope so!)

-BooBerry

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Post Options Post Options   Quote Frigidus Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: August 28 2005 at 12:52pm
There's just something so ironic about this movie's title, but I can't quite figure out what it is.....
The only one who can size a movie up by its trailer.
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Post Options Post Options   Quote HeadRAZZBerry Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: August 28 2005 at 2:13pm

Yes, it DOES look like Ashlee and Jessica may be 2005's answer to Mary Kate and Ashley...

Specifically on the subject of UNDISCOVERED, check out this quote from Box Office Mojo: "Opening weekends don't get much worse than UNDISCOVERED's. Lions Gate's romantic music drama stayed true to its title, with an estimated $690,000 at 1,304 venues, averaging $529 per theatre. Only seven previous wide releases on record had weaker per theatre averages in the past 25 years, but even the likes of FROM JUSTIN TO KELLY and GLITTER made over three times as much." 

Further research at B.O. Mojo reveals that Madonna in SWEPT AWAY and Joe Ezterhas' fabulously unfinny flop AN ALAN SMITHEE FILM: BURN, HOLLYWOOD BURN (the two LOWEST-GROSSING Worst Picture "winners" to date) also did about THREE TIMES AS MUCH per screen their opening weekends -- OUCH!!!   

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Post Options Post Options   Quote BooBerry Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: August 28 2005 at 4:22pm

Originally posted by HeadRAZZBerry

Further research at B.O. Mojo reveals that Madonna in SWEPT AWAY and Joe Ezterhas' fabulously unfinny flop AN ALAN SMITHEE FILM: BURN, HOLLYWOOD BURN (the two LOWEST-GROSSING Worst Picture "winners" to date) also did about THREE TIMES AS MUCH per screen their opening weekends -- OUCH!!!   

Damn! That must've been a serious blow to Lions Gate!

So, I guess that qualifies it for a Worst Picture nomination then, huh?

-BooBerry

 

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Post Options Post Options   Quote deadguy76 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: August 28 2005 at 6:44pm
Originally posted by HeadRAZZBerry

Yes, it DOES look like Ashlee and Jessica may be 2005's answer to Mary Kate and Ashley...

Is there any proof that they're actually related? They look nothing alike. Could it just be a marketing gimmic?

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Post Options Post Options   Quote HeadRAZZBerry Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: August 29 2005 at 1:39am
According to their IMdB Bios (and the IMdB IS, admittedly, WRONG at least 5% of the time) Jessica and Ashlee Simpson were both born in Texas in 1980 and 1984, respectively, to parents "Joe & Tina Simpson." So the sibling rumor SEEMS to be true. Besides, why would ANYONE claim to be related to EITHER ONE of these two Brainless BLonde Bimbos if they weren't -- It's not likie the claim would help either of them be taken more seriously!  
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Post Options Post Options   Quote HeadRAZZBerry Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: August 29 2005 at 1:43am
In REPLY to "BooBerry" --  Actually, mere Box Office BOMBdom does NOT guarantee something a RAZZIE® Nomination, though the two often DO go hand-in-hand. UNDISCOVERED would need to reach a certain level of awareness AS a Box Office Bomb to come to our Voting Members' attention -- And this morning's L.A. TIMES piece on weekend box office guess-timates had NO mention of UNDISCOVERED and how poorly it fared   ...
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Post Options Post Options   Quote JoeBacon Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: August 29 2005 at 2:17pm
Razz, I have a feeling that UNDISCOVERED is gonna be buried in the same
landfill as that other MESSTERPIECE, HOUSE OF "D"
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Post Options Post Options   Quote HeadRAZZBerry Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: September 08 2005 at 1:58am

This Just In: According to B.O. MoJo, UNDISCOVERED may have set a New Box Office Record -- Lowest Per Screen Average EVER: On Tuesday, September 6, this film took in...$12 per theatre!  No word yet on whether the one-and-three-fifths people per venue who attended UNDISCOVERED that day did or did not enjoy the experience  ...

To track its further plummet in The Red Ink Record Books, here's a LINK to B.O. MoJo's page for it:

http://www.boxofficemojo.com/movies/?page=daily&id=undis covered.htm

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Post Options Post Options   Quote deadguy76 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: September 15 2005 at 8:08am
Originally posted by HeadRAZZBerry

According to their IMdB Bios (and the IMdB IS, admittedly, WRONG at least 5% of the time) Jessica and Ashlee Simpson were both born in Texas in 1980 and 1984, respectively, to parents "Joe & Tina Simpson." So the sibling rumor SEEMS to be true. Besides, why would ANYONE claim to be related to EITHER ONE of these two Brainless BLonde Bimbos if they weren't -- It's not likie the claim would help either of them be taken more seriously!  
I was flipping through the channels the other day and I saw a special on E! channel. It showed both the Simpson parents who have BLUE EYES. Which would make it biologically impossible for Jessica to be their child since she has brown eyes. Blue eyes are recessive trait, Brown dominant. Who are Jessica simpson's real parents?
"Woody Allen, whatever his failings, does not make movies for morons. Most directors do. Of course, most directors are morons."

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Post Options Post Options   Quote deadguy76 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: October 02 2005 at 6:42pm

It's lip-sync Simpson's birthday today. Yippee

Also, she's going to be the musical guest on next weeks Saturday Night Live. Maybe she'll remember that it's a "live" show and you have to do your own singing. Then again, who the hell would want to hear her sing? I personally don't care what she sounds like. I (like everyone else) am just waiting for the Maxim spread.

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Post Options Post Options   Quote deadguy76 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: October 07 2005 at 7:19pm
I wonder if they actually sang happy birthday, or used tape. Hmm....
"Woody Allen, whatever his failings, does not make movies for morons. Most directors do. Of course, most directors are morons."

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Post Options Post Options   Quote deadguy76 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: October 08 2005 at 7:06pm

Ok so I admit I watched SNL, but hey I've been watching since the late 80s when Phil Hartmann was still alive.

Ashlee has a new bleach blonde 'do that makes her look like a fifth rate Paris Hilton wannabe. Here's my David Spade impression: "Ashlee, I don't care about the real Paris Hilton (sarcastic voice) and I don't care about the fake one."

Before singing a pathetic whiny ballad, she states "I wrote this song after my last experience." What experience?? You didn't do anything last time except lip-sync!!

"Woody Allen, whatever his failings, does not make movies for morons. Most directors do. Of course, most directors are morons."

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Post Options Post Options   Quote BooBerry Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: October 20 2005 at 5:49pm

Yo, howdy all. BooBerry, here. Everybody's favorite poster here on Razzies.com with a quick report on this sorry excuse for a movie. According to amazon.com, UNDISCOVERED is scheduled to be released on DVD on December 27, 2005! (Just in time for the nominating ballots, by the way! )

Here's link to check for yourself:

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/B000BQYX4C/qid =1129883311/sr=8-2/ref=pd_bbs_2/002-1974372-6593640?v=glance &s=dvd&n=507846

Just letting you all know.

-BooBerry

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