Brothers, Where Art Thy Talent??

ESSENTIALLY MALE CLONES of MILEY CYRUS (IN TRIPLICATE, YET!) THE JONAS BROTHERS ARE the LATEST INCARNATION of DISNEY's CYNICAL / CYCLICAL CORPORATE PLOY of MANUFACTURING TWEEN IDOLS, ONLY to MILK the LIVING HELL OUT of THEM for AS LONG AS THEY'RE APPEALING in a PUPPY-LIKE WAY.

BUT DO the BROTHERS REALIZE IT'S ONLY a MATTER of TIME BEFORE DISNEY DUMPS THEM on the ASH-HEAP of AMERICAN CULTURE...PROBABLY BEFORE THEY'RE EVEN OLD ENOUGH to LEGALLY DRINK??

ADDING to the CYNICISM of JONAS BROTHERS: THE 3-D CONCERT EXPERIENCE WAS the FILM's 76-MINUTE RUNNING TIME, SUGGESTING IT MIGHT HAVE BEEN MADE AS a 90-MINUTE CABLE SPECIAL (COMPLETE with 14 MINUTES for COMMERCIALS) THAT WAS RELEASED THEATRICALLY to MAKE a FAST BUCK.

BUT the BUX DIDN'T COME in SO FAST AFTER ALL: DESPITE PREDICTIONS THAT IT WOULD TOP the $31 MILLION THAT GREETED LAST YEAR's HANNAH MONTANA/MILEY CYRUS CONCERT MOVIE, J.B. 3-D MADE LESS THAN 40% of THAT ITS FIRST 3 DAZE, and BASICALLY GOT ITS OPENING WEEKEND CLOCK CLEANED by the 2nd WEEKEND of the DECIDEDLY MEDIOCRE MADEA GOES to JAIL.

FACTOR IN THAT the 3 BROs ARE ALMOST AS TALENTED AS the CLUB-FOOTED CAST of HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL 3, and YOU'VE GOT PERFECT FODDER for a RAZZIE® NOM...OR TWO!

BRO #1: "Is that a crowd of screaming fans chasing us...?"

BRO #2: "Or angry film critics...?"

BRO #3: "Or worse -- angry tweens' parents screaming for their money back?!?!?!"

Frank hit the nail on the head. Parents are finally putting their feet down and refusing to sit through this crap because their 'tween kids eat this stuff up like Disney wants them to.

That, and I do agree that much of Miley Cyrus' success is from pedophiles.

 

This movie is for the kids/teens. Really, if you think it's a bad thing...anyway, I'm sure you liked things as a kid that probably, as adults, you would think why.

I told a lot of kids at school about this tanking, and they all had the same response: "Good, I f*ckin' hate them!" I'm not joking, they all said that. Almost every single kid in the school can't stand them. They're not too hot on Miley Cyrus or the "High School Musical" brats either.

I started looking at the students' t-shirts and what musicians they liked. Here's the groups (or people) I saw them wearing: The Beatles, Bob Dylan, The Rolling Stones, Jimi Hendrix, Bob Marley, Led Zeppelin, Nirvava, The Who, Johnny Cash, John Lennon, The Doors, Van Morrison, Run D.M.C., The Grateful Dead, Aerosmith, AC/DC, Black Sabbath, Tupac Shakur, Guns 'N' Roses, Nine Inch Nails, and Lynard Skynard. Those 21 mentioned all have something in common: all of them, including the dead ones, have more talent in there left pinkies (or right, in Hendrix's case) than the Jonas B*tches have in there whole bodies.

There is one example of a kid who wore a band t-shirt but had no idea about them. This kid was wearing a "Dark Side Of The Moon" t-shirt and I said: "You're a regular Roger Waters." And he just stared. I started naming off other Pink Floyd people, David Gilmore, Syd Barret, Nick Mason, Rick Wright. To screw with him, I threw Bill Wyeman in there and he thought it was a Pink Floyd member. Then, I asked him to name one song from "Dark Side". He couldn't think of any. I asked the kid next to me and he shouted "Money" and "Shine On You Crazy Diamond" almost instantly. Other than the kid up there, everyone seems to be really devoted to music. Kids drop in lyrics from songs and the others know it. Even I do that; I quote the final verse of "Not To Touch The Earth".

I swear to God, MiguelAntilisu is going to cum in his underwear when he sees a forum dedicated to the Jonas Bros. Maybe HeadRazz is opening his eyes to the new Disney.

DISNEY? How can any of the stuff that's going on now even be related to the great Walt Disney? If you watch the Disney Channel and their shilled sh*t, it's aimed at spoiled, narcissistic girls who think normal-looking guys are the plague, and that Zac Efron and the JoBros are worth f**kin'. (I hope that last statement gets a laugh)  

And how the hell can the Jonas Bros. be compared to the Beatles? I'm not a fan of the band, but Paul McCartney and the gang are legends, so I'll give them that much. My mom doesn't know who the JoBros are, and once I dropped the bombshell, she scoffed.

And the fact that critics came down hard on this film, as well as its being beaten by Tyler Perry's latest, really says something. Suddenly, Perry's not looking so bad in comparison. That doesn't mean I'll go rush out to see his films, however.

I hope y'all watched Chelsea Lately on E! network. They made lotsa jokes at the expent of the JoBros.

Well, I heard from a reliable source that they caught this little tidbit in a J-Bros interview with Barbara Walters (I assume this was the Grammy interview). And I heard that Walters wasn't taking it, at all, seriously. They debunked this, but as Patrick Stewart said in X-Men: The Last Stand, "there will be no going back".

Originally posted by CriticalFrank Comparing the Beatles to the Jonas Brothers... Isn't that a mortal sin? I think that's something that people can go to Hell for... I'm pretty sure I read that in the Bible somewhere...

*Quickly hides his Miley Cyrus tickets* *cough* *ahem*

I suppose that someone should note that Disney isn't alone in its guilt of exploiting children for the purpose of hauling in cash. How about that ETRADE talking baby? The poor kid's fortune will likely be squandered by greedy relatives before he is even out of diapers.

And for the record, I really wouldn't watch Hannah Montana if she were playing a concert across the street. I might use binoculars though