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FINGERING FREDDY for a NOT-SO-SCARY REMAKE...

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HeadRAZZBerry View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Quote HeadRAZZBerry Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Topic: FINGERING FREDDY for a NOT-SO-SCARY REMAKE...
    Posted: April 29 2010 at 8:59am
ADS for THIS UTTERLY UN-CALLED-FOR REMAKE MADE IT LOOK LIKE MAYBE IT'D LIVE UP to ITS HYPE... 

BUT THEN ITS R.T. NUMBER the DAY BEFORE IT OPENED WAS a STRAIGHT-UP ZERO, and WE REALIZED THAT, EVEN THOUGH THIS "RE-IMAGINING" of NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET CLEVERLY CAST CREEPY/COOL 2006 OSCAR® NOMINEE JACKIE EARLE HALEY as FREDDY-with-the-SCISSOR-FINGERS, IT COULD STILL BE a RAZZIE® CONTENDUH. THOSE EARLY REVIEWS SUGGEST THAT THIS LATEST RE-TREAD from TALENT-FREE PRODUCER MICHAEL BAY IS ABOUT as EXCITING and SCARY as BAY's WORST PICTURE / WORST DIRECTOR "WINNING" TRANNIES, TOO WAS COHERENT. 

OH, WELL, GUESS IT's JUST ONE MORE LAME-O HORROR REMAKE in a YEAR WHERE, 1/3 of the WAY THROUGH, WE'VE SEEN ALMOST NOTHING ORIGINAL COME OUT of HOLLYWOOD... 

NOW COMES YOUR CHANCE to SHARPEN YOUR OWN "SCISSOR-FINGERS" and SET ABOUT SLICING and DICING...



GENERIC HUNK #37a: "I'll be reading for the part of 
the handsome but stupid guy who charms the ladies, 
only to end up being killed during a gratuitous sex scene..."  

LONG-HAIRED DIRECTOR: "Which one?? We have 7 
of those in this film..."   

Ye Olde Head RAZZberry
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MiguelAntilsu View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Quote MiguelAntilsu Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 29 2010 at 9:56am
The upside to this film: It's not directed by Michael Bay.  If it were, then horror movie fans would really have to worry.
 
The above post gives me all the more reason to watch the Kentucky Derby instead of going to the movies this weekend...  
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Post Options Post Options   Quote BurnHollywoodBurn Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 29 2010 at 11:17am
I was wondering when this uncalled for remake was going to show up here. Yeah, it's not directed by Michael Bay, but he produced it, and producers have just as much creative input to movies as the director does. Wait, did I just have Michael Bay and the word "creative" in the same sentance? How silly of me! Bad, BHB, bad! Yeah, word of advice everyone, SAVE YOUR MONEY .... for "Ironman 2"!
The Four Horsemen of the Moviepocalypse: uncalled for sequels/remakes/reboots, 3-D surcharges, untalented "celebrities", and anything with Michael Bay's name attached to it.
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Post Options Post Options   Quote Berrynoia Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 29 2010 at 12:08pm

"Welcome to Razzie time, bitch!"

I've seen all of the Freddy movies (with the exception of New Nightmare for some reason), and I liked them.  Yes, even with Freddy turning into a more comedic villain:

"This is your brain on drugs.  Any questions?" (SLAM!) "Yeah, what are you on? Looks like eggs and a frying pan to me."

Freddy          Spencer
99999            05122                  "I beat my high score."  (Freddy's Dead)
 
dink dink dink dink dink dink dink dink dink dink dink dink...."Tilt." (Freddy v. Jason).
 
Still, I liked them, basically as a fan of the Nightmare on Elm Street series.  However, I am seriously thinking about staying away from this remake.  Jason can be replaced with a different actor, but for Freddy, you can't replace Robert Englund.  Besides, I think some people are really afraid to live on an Elm Street because of those films!
 
I am going to keep greater track of this movie's response by critics and IMDB users.  This and Furry so far have goose eggs on the Tomatometer.
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Post Options Post Options   Quote moviewizguy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 29 2010 at 2:13pm

I've seen all the Nightmares as well, but you should really see New Nightmare. That's, IMO, the best one in the entire franchise. I didn't like the first one because the ending ruined the whole point of the film, but I understand the producer made Craven change the ending.

Still, I liked them, basically as a fan of the Nightmare on Elm Street series.  However, I am seriously thinking about staying away from this remake.  Jason can be replaced with a different actor, but for Freddy, you can't replace Robert Englund.  Besides, I think some people are really afraid to live on an Elm Street because of those films!

Really? I was looking forward to this film until the negative reviews came pouring in because I thought it couldn't possibly be worse than the F13 remake but somehow, I'm proven wrong. I think it's kinda ridiculous because the trailer for this film showed immensly better acting from the cast than in F13 and this film actually has a story rather than a masked man killing teens who do drugs and have sex and this remake doesn't even have nudity.  

Originally posted by Berrynoia

"Welcome to Razzie time, bitch!"

I've seen all of the Freddy movies (with the exception of New Nightmare for some reason), and I liked them.  Yes, even with Freddy turning into a more comedic villain:

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Post Options Post Options   Quote BurnHollywoodBurn Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 29 2010 at 2:39pm
Yeah, when the "horror" movie villain becomes a bad comedian, you know the series has jumped the shark. Plus, these movies are produced by Michael "The Hack" Bay, so you should ALWAYS keep your standards LOW for them.
The Four Horsemen of the Moviepocalypse: uncalled for sequels/remakes/reboots, 3-D surcharges, untalented "celebrities", and anything with Michael Bay's name attached to it.
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Post Options Post Options   Quote Julianstark Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 29 2010 at 6:55pm
It actually wasn't half bad. It wasn't scary (minus a jump scare or two) but it's basically just a fun little "horror" movie that wasn't trying to be anything different. I won't pretend that it's great cinema, but it's certainly not "Razzie bad." I know, the majority of critics disagree with me on this -- but it's not terrible.

IMHO, we should keep our Razzie focus on such duds as The Bounty Hunter, Clash of the Titans, and (especially) Leap Year

Oh, and also watch out for Furry Vengeance. I won't bring myself to watch that "movie" (if you want to call it that), but I know it's getting tons of mentions on my Razzie ballot   

RESPONSE from Head RAZZberry: BTW -- FURRY VENGEANCE is our other Worst of the Weak pick. Here's a LINK to the RAZZIE® Forum discussion on it... 


For Your 2010 Razzie Consideration: The Bounty Hunter and Leap Year --
Check out my blog! Movies and Other Things
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Post Options Post Options   Quote cvcjr13 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 29 2010 at 7:10pm
Oh my words!  Richard Roeper gave it a good review!  Wow. . . .
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Post Options Post Options   Quote BurnHollywoodBurn Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 29 2010 at 8:01pm
Why do I feel a "One Vs. One Hundred" joke coming on??  

Originally posted by cvcjr13

Oh my words!  Richard Roeper gave it a good review!  Wow. . . .
The Four Horsemen of the Moviepocalypse: uncalled for sequels/remakes/reboots, 3-D surcharges, untalented "celebrities", and anything with Michael Bay's name attached to it.
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Post Options Post Options   Quote moviewizguy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 29 2010 at 8:17pm
I really enjoyed Richard Roeper's review. It gives me a little light at the end of the tunnel.
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Post Options Post Options   Quote BurnHollywoodBurn Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 30 2010 at 4:49am
Richard Roeper's "good" review's nice and all -- but again, that's one good review versus 100 bad reviews. That's not a good track record.  
The Four Horsemen of the Moviepocalypse: uncalled for sequels/remakes/reboots, 3-D surcharges, untalented "celebrities", and anything with Michael Bay's name attached to it.
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Post Options Post Options   Quote dEd Grimley Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 30 2010 at 7:12am
Here's the thing about so many horror movies these days... They don't "get" that they're not actually scary. And slashers never really were. They used to be somewhat innovative though on trying to accomplish things with a low budget; create a death that looked really fancy or whatever but without the big budget. Now, people are REALLY paying to see these things, so they give them the budget, and the producers spend that money lobotomizing the movies.
And people aren't paying to see crazy kills or whatever, even. They're paying for nostalgia, or a chance to be a part of a franchise they might've missed out on before. Or the third option, they're older teenagers who got over that sour candy phase that kids go through in their early teens and now they need something new and unbearable to sit through, so they can say to their buddies, "Wasn't that cool?" And they have to agree, and they have to sit through it, or they're not... I don't even know what word to use, but it's ostracism.
I dunno, there may have been a point to all of these crap remake/reboot/sequel horror movies at one point, but they've sure sucked the soul out of them lately.
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Post Options Post Options   Quote Vits Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 30 2010 at 8:04am
Obviously the best of most franchises is usually the first movie, but for me it was NEW NIGHTMARE(the 7th one).It went all ADAPTATION by having a "script-within-a-script-within-a-script...".

Not to mention that FREDDY went back to being a non-comic villian, which was what ruined the CHILD'S PLAY movies(SEED OF CHUCKY anyone?).
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Post Options Post Options   Quote BurnHollywoodBurn Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 30 2010 at 11:17am
THANK YOU! And that is why horror movies (and in this case, remakes of horror movies) suck to high heaven!   

Originally posted by dEd Grimley

Here's the thing about so many horror movies these days... They don't "get" that they're not actually scary. And slashers never really were. They used to be somewhat innovative though on trying to accomplish things with a low budget; create a death that looked really fancy or whatever but without the big budget. Now, people are REALLY paying to see these things, so they give them the budget, and the producers spend that money lobotomizing the movies. 
And people aren't paying to see crazy kills or whatever, even. They're paying for nostalgia, or a chance to be a part of a franchise they might've missed out on before. Or the third option, they're older teenagers who got over that sour candy phase that kids go through in their early teens and now they need something new and unbearable to sit through, so they can say to their buddies, "Wasn't that cool?" And they have to agree, and they have to sit through it, or they're not... I don't even know what word to use, but it's ostracism. 
I dunno, there may have been a point to all of these crap remake/reboot/sequel horror movies at one point, but they've sure sucked the soul out of them lately.
The Four Horsemen of the Moviepocalypse: uncalled for sequels/remakes/reboots, 3-D surcharges, untalented "celebrities", and anything with Michael Bay's name attached to it.
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Post Options Post Options   Quote saturnwatcher Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 30 2010 at 3:00pm
There is really only one point to be made here, and Head Razz nailed it above. There was absolutely, positively NO REASON whatsover to remake this movie, apart from the obvious fact that there isn't a single studio, or studio head left in Hollywood with enough creativity or stones to do anything new. PERIOD.  
Nine times out of ten, in art as in life, there is no truth to be discovered, only an error to be exposed.--H.L. Menken
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Post Options Post Options   Quote GTAHater767 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 30 2010 at 5:09pm
I knew from the start this would be a contender. Less than 12 hours after release, it has an abysmal score of 14% at Rotten Tomatoes. But if our '009 award nominations were any indication (15 films took all the nominations) this one probably won't get nominated. Come to think of it, this movie probably doesn't stand a chance against all those failed romances in the '010 RAZZIES.
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