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How LOW Can Your Libido Go??

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HeadRAZZBerry View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Quote HeadRAZZBerry Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Topic: How LOW Can Your Libido Go??
    Posted: March 13 2009 at 4:30am

THIS LOWEST-COMMON-DENOMINATOR MOVIE RAISES SEVERAL CURIOUS QUESTIONS:

1) WHY WAS MISS MARCH, WHICH MAKES THOSE REVENGE of the NERDS MOVIES LOOK LIKE INGMAR BERGMAN, RELEASED by FOX SEARCHLIGHT (THE SAME "SPECIALTY DIVISION" THAT  RELEASED SLUMDOG MILLIONAIRE)?

2) HOW DID a SCRIPT THIS BLATANTLY BRAINLESS EVER GET GREEN-LIGHTED by a MAJOR STUDIO? 

3) WHY DID a MOVIE THIS FORMULAIC and UNIMAGINATIVE REQUIRE TWO DIRECTORS? 

4) HOW DID FOX JUSTIFY COSTLY RE-SHOOTS on THIS TURKEY WHEN PLAYBOY PATRIARCH HUGH HEFNER AGREED to PLAY HIMSELF in SEVERAL SCENES (RESULTING in the SCRAPPING of FOOTAGE with REVERSE MORTGAGE PITCHMAN ROBERT WAGNER PLAYING the PART)?

5) IF the STUDIO WASN'T CONVINCED THIS ONE SUCT, WHY DID IT OPEN "IN GENERAL RELEASE" with NO PRINT AD in THE L.A. TIMES?? 

6) IF HEFNER SURVIVES 'TILL NEXT MONTH, MIGHT HE ACTUALLY SHOW UP to COLLECT the WORST SUPPORTING ACTOR RAZZIE® HE DESERVES a SHOT at "WINNING" for THIS??

...AND FINALLY: 

7) WHAT'RE YOU WAITIN' FOR???  GO AHEAD -- HAVE at IT!!!


HEF: "Is it just me, or does this look like we're doing a remake 

of WEEKEND AT BERNIE'S ...and I'm playing the dead guy Bernie!"

Ye Olde Head RAZZberry
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sportsartist24 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Quote sportsartist24 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 13 2009 at 11:25am
Looks like I'll be the first one to comment on this one. Perhaps for a second year in a row, we may have two directors nominated for Worst Director for a single film. Last year, two movies directed by two directors were nominated -- Aaron Seltzer and Jason Friedberg for both Disaster Movie and Meet the Spartans (who've never been good at directing, and never will be).
The Mormons were'nt really popular in the beginning, they're now becoming more popular, even in Hollywood.
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Post Options Post Options   Quote CptnHotsauce Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 13 2009 at 12:10pm
the whole premise sounds like the marketing department decided to make a movie after hearing Angel Little Centerfold one too many times
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Michaels View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Quote Michaels Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 13 2009 at 5:36pm
I'm just surprised Hef is still among the living. You would think he would O.D. on a little blue pill by now, or at least be numb from the waist down and be in a wheelchair. Gee, first "The House Bunny", now this movie. Does Playboy really need to make 90 minute long ads for itself in theaters? You would think a magazine that exists for the sole reason of showcasing naked women would be able to sell itself after all these years.
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Post Options Post Options   Quote dEd Grimley Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 13 2009 at 8:15pm
Does Playboy need to make 90 minute ads? Actually, they probably do. Playboy is veeerrryy quickly fading into obscurity and becoming obsolete. Is there ANY reason to still need a subscription to Playboy with the internet out there? Doesn't an issue cost like... a lot of dollars? (I've never been a fan, I've understood the whole "online" thing since before the internet got big and it happened just as I became old enough to care.)

I'm curious about this movie, as a Whitest Kids U Know fan. I almost wonder if Trevor and Zach weren't asked to make a movie at first, and they turned it down. If you look at WKUK sketches and compare it to this hackneyed idea, it's way, way below their normal level of creativity. The premise of this movie is just so incredibly forced. And if they were really serious about making a movie with people in WKUK, they'd clearly need to include "Timmy Dance," and it'd need to be in the commercials.
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Post Options Post Options   Quote sportsartist24 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 15 2009 at 4:34pm
After the weekend's box office results, this movie barely made it in the top 10, but only made $2.3 million in its opening weekend.
The Mormons were'nt really popular in the beginning, they're now becoming more popular, even in Hollywood.
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Post Options Post Options   Quote dEd Grimley Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 16 2009 at 3:19am
Is no one paying attention to the fact that Paul Blart is still in the top 10? Didn't that movie come out when the stock market really started to tumble? I think I have my scape goat.
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Post Options Post Options   Quote wolfee37 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 19 2009 at 10:47am
The film was kind of funy. The two leads were annoying but they had funny lines and it was a good forgetable film. High Hefner was brutal though.
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Post Options Post Options   Quote wolfee37 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 19 2009 at 10:47am

Hugh Hefner**

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CriticalFrank View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Quote CriticalFrank Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 19 2009 at 11:01am
Originally posted by dEd Grimley

Is no one paying attention to the fact that Paul Blart is still in the top 10? Didn't that movie come out when the stock market really started to tumble? I think I have my scape goat.


Are you suggesting that Paul Blart is actually at fault for the Stock Market nose-dive?

That actually makes sense! Someone get the Pitchforks and Torches! We need ourselves an Angry Mob! :)
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Post Options Post Options   Quote Michaels Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 19 2009 at 3:35pm

Originally posted by CriticalFrank


Are you suggesting that Paul Blart is actually at fault for the Stock Market nose-dive?

Actually, the success of "Paul Blart" is the result of what happens when movie goers are willing to pay to turn off their brains for 90 minutes. You see now why I'm against stupid movies?

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Post Options Post Options   Quote CriticalFrank Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 20 2009 at 12:28am
Originally posted by Michaels

Originally posted by CriticalFrank


Are you suggesting that Paul Blart is actually at fault for the Stock Market nose-dive?

Actually, the success of "Paul Blart" is the result of what happens when movie goers are willing to pay to turn off their brains for 90 minutes. You see now why I'm against stupid movies?



I think I could understand your hatred of stupid movies more, if you were blaming Paul Blart for economic hardships. Blaming the economic hardships for the success of Paul Blart... that seems less natural. But hey, whatever floats your boat. :)
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Post Options Post Options   Quote Michaels Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 20 2009 at 1:47am

Originally posted by CriticalFrank


I think I could understand your hatred of stupid movies more, if you were blaming Paul Blart for economic hardships. Blaming the economic hardships for the success of Paul Blart... that seems less natural. But hey, whatever floats your boat. :)

I don't know, during these hard times, one could just as easily rent a classic, good comedy if all they want to do is sit back and laugh. You would also have to consider Blart's PG rating (hence tickets are sold in fours since kids can join) and the fact it was the only comedy among all Oscar baiter dramas.

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Post Options Post Options   Quote dEd Grimley Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 20 2009 at 2:50am
Yea, but that was like 10 months ago, when PB:MC first came out... But it's still out... Still in the top 10... I dunno, to me, it's like exporting Jerry Springer to the Middle East... If that's not about the most embarrassing thing a country can do...
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Post Options Post Options   Quote CriticalFrank Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 20 2009 at 7:58am
Originally posted by dEd Grimley

Yea, but that was like 10 months ago, when PB:MC first came out... But it's still out... Still in the top 10... I dunno, to me, it's like exporting Jerry Springer to the Middle East... If that's not about the most embarrassing thing a country can do...


Oh, there's much more embarrassing things a country could do, such as:

1: Greenlight Seltzerberg "movies"
2: Export those same Seltzerberg "movies" to any country
3: Having to report that the Seltzerberg "comedies" are in the top 10.

Sending Jerry Springer to the Middle east pales in comparrison. As far as Paul Blart goes... it's only been out for 10 weeks... And people seem to love stupidity like that.

And for a final thing that would be more embarrassing, but on a personal level, rather than a country-wide level....

Be found dead in your house/apartment, with a copy of Meet The Spartans in your Blu-Ray player, and a broken copy of Disaster Movie embedded in your skull...

Sorry, had to toss in that last one, after the image came to me while typing out the rest of that... My mind is a horrible horrible place...
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Post Options Post Options   Quote dEd Grimley Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 20 2009 at 1:06pm
Originally posted by CriticalFrank


Originally posted by dEd Grimley

Is no one paying attention to the fact that Paul Blart is still in the top 10? Didn't that movie come out when the stock market really started to tumble? I think I have my scape goat.
Are you suggesting that Paul Blart is actually at fault for the Stock Market nose-dive? That actually makes sense! Someone get the Pitchforks and Torches! We need ourselves an Angry Mob! :)


I'm not sayin, but I'm sayin... I think the market materialized in human form, watched that movie, and slit its wrists.
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