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MOVIE 43

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Vits View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Quote Vits Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Topic: MOVIE 43
    Posted: July 31 2013 at 11:57am
These guys tried to defend this movie. For those who've seen it, I've got to ask: Is it true that it's not worse than NORBIT, WHITE CHICKS, THE LOVE GURU, JACK & JILL or DISASTER MOVIE?
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Post Options Post Options   Quote SchumacherH8ter Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: July 31 2013 at 12:48pm
I hated it more than White Chicks, The Love Guru, and Disaster Movie, but it's not as bad as Norbit or Jack And Jill.
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Post Options Post Options   Quote oiram Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: July 31 2013 at 12:54pm
I would say some of them are close to being as offensive/stupid as Movie 43.
Elizabeth Hartman and Judith Barsi are more talented and beautiful than Scarlett Johansson and Chloe Grace Moretz. Fact.

Worst Supporting Actor: Brendan Fraser/Gimme Shelter and The Nut Job


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Post Options Post Options   Quote AndP Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: October 19 2013 at 9:20pm
I'm definitely in favor of a Worst Screen Ensemble nomination, but I think some should be in the acting categories too. Particularly those with other bad performances (for example if Josh Duhamel gets one for Safe Haven, mention this too) or those who are extremely unlikely to ever again be in something this bad and thus we'd never have another chance at them (Kate Winslet, Naomi Watts).
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Post Options Post Options   Quote Vits Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: January 07 2014 at 3:02pm
For those who've seen it, I need your help. This guy wrote a semi-review in Spanish. I'll translate it for you: "I agree with the movie's biting critique of the "American way of life", as well as the government and the consuming society that has dominated the idiosyncrasy of our buddies from the north since the '50s. On the other hand, there's a message hidden with roots in Rosa Luxemburg that trascends the critical moments". Is he right?
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Post Options Post Options   Quote cvcjr13 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: February 09 2014 at 7:57pm
Now for the razzing. . . .

SPOILER ALERT

But remember, I have no problem spoiling something that's already spoiled!

We've got this portmanteau film, most segments framed by desperate screenwriter Dennis Quaid holding milquetoast studio exec Greg Kinnear at gunpoint demanding that he listen to his wonderful script, which filled me with wonder, like I wonder who would finance movies like Movie 43?

Oh, excuse me, it would be financed by a billionaire who is crazy like a fox.  Movie 43 cost $6 million to make, and hauled in $29 million worldwide.  Check it out at Box Office Mojo.  So, how would you like to quintuple your investment in a year?

So, does that mean that we will see a Movie 44 as opposed to a great movie about the life and times of Bass Reeves, a real life Arkansas slave who became one of the few if not the first black lawmen in the Wild West and quite possibly served as the inspiration for the Lone Ranger? . . .

Please don't answer that. . . . Cry

We are then subjected to one awful, reprehensible, unfunny, painful idea after another.  

Want to see Kate Winslett go Twilight Zone while dating Hugh Jackman with his manhood on his neck and no one but Winslett sees anything disgustingly odd about him?  You got it anyway. . . .

Want to see a high schooler get homeschooled by his parents, to the point where he is abused and molested in the name of making sure he has all those "life experiences"?  This includes his mother, Naomi Watts, not only giving him his first kiss but saying she wants to give him his first time, too?  You got it anyway. . . .

Note:  the film cuts away at that point, being one of the few times this movie spared the crassness. . . .

Want to see Anna Faris propose that Chris Pratt, who stars in the movie Her with all those little naked golden men dangling all around it, Censored on her?  And so Pratt, armed with way too much info about the subject from one of his friends, goes for it?  You got it anyway. . . .

Want to see Halle Berry and Stephen Merchant go at the Dare in a game of Truth or Dare, graduating from grabbing people and ruining kid's parties to plastic surgery, not to mention Berry using her fake oversized boob to mix guacamole?  You got it anyway.  What's more, this was the least worst part in the whole movie! . . . 

We've got wackos romanticizing on the store's intercom, a music player shaped like a naked cutie with a fan in her womanhood, DC Comics characters in speed dating with poor Robin getting the butt end, a PSA about how we shouldn't curse office machines because kids are inside of them, a basketball story where the coach demands his team buy into racial stereotypes, a girl having her first menstruation at the home of her boyfriend and no male knows anything about what to do, one brother giving a tied-up murderous leprechaun as a gift to his other brother but the leprechaun has a brother too (okay, this sketch sounds better than it turned out), and Charlie Sheen favoring his cartoon cat, who is secretly horny for Sheen, over his girlfriend, who the cat goes all Chucky on. . . .

Do you want any of that?  Well, you got it anyway. . . .

END OF SPOILERS

. . . but unfortunately not of this spoiled movie?

Is it worse than A Madea's Christmas?  I laughed when Tyler Perry and Larry the Cable Guy started riffing back and forth in that one scene, so I have to say yes, Movie 43 is worse. . . .

Is it worse than The Lone Ranger?  This is infinitely worse than taking the character of the Lone Ranger, turning him into a manchild antihero with his head up where there is no sunshine and Johnny Depp's Tonto, which does disservice to that great painting by Kirby Sattler.  Although parts of that movie make me wonder if it didn't start as a Tim Burton movie until it was given over to Jerry Bruckheimer, but I'm just speculating. . . .

Is it worse than After Earth?  Despite the bazillion flashblacks, the whole movie being carried on the back of Jaden Smith's mediocre acting (which made me wonder what happened between this movie and the remake of The Karate Kid?), the bad way great ideas are presented like Will Smith's character not being able to experience fear and so being invisible to the human-killing ursas, and the boring, boring result. . . oh, yes, Movie 43 is much worse than After Earth.

Is it worse than Grown Ups 2?  Well, Movie 43 makes Grown Ups 2 look like classic comedy.  Considering Grown Ups 2 is worse than Grown Ups, which only had one scene that made me laugh, that's not saying a whole lot.  Maybe Rob Schneider was lucky not to be in the sequel?  Maybe Nick Swardson wasn't so lucky?   Maybe no one in Movie 43 was as lucky as Nick Swardson? . . . .

Still, my advocacy is for Movie 43 getting as many Razzies as we can possibly bestow on it, including a worst actress for Naomi Watts.  I know, Halle Berry is also up for worst actress for the same movie, but which is worse. . . what Berry allowed to be filmed without using any of her clout to improve it, or what Watts allowed to be filmed without using any of her clout to improve it?  

And to be honest, improving it would have been as easy as erasing the hard drive. . . .

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Post Options Post Options   Quote cvcjr13 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: February 10 2014 at 8:00pm
Originally posted by Vits

For those who've seen it, I need your help. This guy wrote a semi-review in Spanish. I'll translate it for you: "I agree with the movie's biting critique of the "American way of life", as well as the government and the consuming society that has dominated the idiosyncrasy of our buddies from the north since the '50s. On the other hand, there's a message hidden with roots in Rosa Luxemburg that trascends the critical moments". Is he right?

I'm afraid our amigo is propelled by his propaganda.  In other words, his assessment is an assemblage of the assumptions he believes rather than what's actually up on the screen, if you know what I mean. . . .

Think about the movie (oh, sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you. . .).  Did it come across as a scathing critique of American life, or did it come across as one sorry ass sketch after another?  If it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck, looks like a duck, then it must be a whole lot better than Movie 43. . . .
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Post Options Post Options   Quote SchumacherH8ter Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: February 10 2014 at 8:25pm
I think we've found the Spanish-language Armond White.
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Post Options Post Options   Quote cvcjr13 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 02 2014 at 6:03pm
I want to thank every Razzie member who voted for Movie 43 as the worst movie of 2013.  It's a rare movie that has so much star-power, yet is so utterly wretched. . . .

But this brings up a technicality:  Did Movie 43 win 3 Razzies, or since their were 13 directors and 19 "screenwriters," did it actually "win" 33 Razzies? 

An even better question: Will even ONE of the dozens of people involved in this awful celluloid offal accept their Razzie for what they put their movie's viewers through?

Actually, I'd prefer an explanation as to why this movie was ever made...and no, I don't accept the Dennis Quaid/Greg Kinnear sketch as an explanation. . . .

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Post Options Post Options   Quote Vits Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 03 2014 at 6:03am
They all admitted not wanting to be in the movie in the first place, they didn't advertise it, and, they didn't even attend the premiere. So I'm sure at least one will accept it.
Originally posted by cvcjr13

Will even ONE of the dozens of people involved in this awful celluloid offal accept their Razzie for what they put their movie's viewers through?

Link.
Originally posted by cvcjr13

I'd prefer an explanation as to why this movie was ever made

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Post Options Post Options   Quote cvcjr13 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 03 2014 at 10:27am
I take it when you say at least "one" will accept it, are you referring to Peter Farrelly, the director who in that article you linked spoke both glowingly about how funny this movie was and knowingly about how low it would rate on RT (it actually rated lower, Peter) and how badly it would go over with the critics?

Thanks for that link, by the way.

It still boggles my mind why these guys thought this was funny and why they went ahead and put it into production.  Are they saying this is the future?

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Post Options Post Options   Quote Vits Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 03 2014 at 10:30am
A lot of the Farrelly bros. movies had good reviews. And they all had the same kind of humour.
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Post Options Post Options   Quote cvcjr13 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: March 04 2014 at 8:17am
Originally posted by Vits

A lot of the Farrelly bros. movies had good reviews. And they all had the same kind of humour.

I'm going to have to view more Farrelly Brothers films.  So far, I've only seen Osmosis Jones, which was fun and informative, a rare feat.

Even so, regardless of how funny they were with There's Something About Mary or Dumb and Dumber, Movie 43 was not funny at all.  It was painful.

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Post Options Post Options   Quote Vits Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 13 2014 at 12:53pm
My review (skip to 03:38):


Originally posted by Grounder the Critic


This is easily going to the number 1 spot now after the horrors of The 41-Year-Old Virgin Who Knocked Up Sarah Marshall and Felt Superbad About It!, Barney's Great Adventure, and Transformers: Dark of the Moon. Those three movies are watchable compared to Movie 43.

Except for BARNEY (which I haven't seen), I agree with you.
Originally posted by Vits

These guys tried to defend this movie. For those who've seen it, I've got to ask: Is it true that it's not worse than NORBIT, WHITE CHICKS, THE LOVE GURU, JACK & JILL or DISASTER MOVIE?

I think it's worse than all of them.
Originally posted by cvcjr13

 
Charlie Sheen favoring his cartoon cat, who is secretly horny for Sheen, over his girlfriend, who the cat goes all Chucky on. . . .

Wrong actor.
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Post Options Post Options   Quote cvcjr13 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 13 2014 at 2:04pm
Sorry, you're right, it was Josh Duhamel.

It was still horrid.

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Post Options Post Options   Quote cvcjr13 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: April 13 2014 at 2:14pm
Wow, Vits, you gave Movie 43 more time than it deserved. . . .

I just saw Kentucky Fried Movie, and it was way, way better than Movie 43.

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