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The SON Also Rises?!?!?

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HeadRAZZBerry View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Quote HeadRAZZBerry Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Topic: The SON Also Rises?!?!?
    Posted: May 30 2010 at 8:39am
WHILE WILL SMITH's SON JADEN WASN'T HORRIBLE in the RAZZIE® NOMINATED DAY THE EARTH STOOD STILL REMAKE, HE ALSO WASN'T EXCEPTIONAL ENOUGH THAT, without HIS DAD's INTERVENTION, HE'D HAVE BEEN OFFERED the LEAD ROLE in a BIG-BUDGET INTERNATIONAL PRODUCTION LIKE THIS UNNECESSARY REMAKE of KARATE KID

AND WHILE RALPH MACCHIO in the 1984 ORIGINAL VERSION WASN'T EXACTLY OSCAR® MATERIAL (IN FACT, by PART III of the ORIGINAL SERIES, MACCHIO and the FILM ITSELF WERE RAZZIE® NOMINEES) HE WAS AT LEAST CREDIBLE as a BULLY-PLAGUED TEEN-AGER WHO TURNS to an ELDERLY ASIAN MAN for TRAINING in the WAYS of KARATE (NORIYUKI "PAT" MORITA as "MR. MIYAGI," WHO in the ORIGINAL ACTUALLY WAS CONSIDERED OSCAR® MATERIAL).  AND REPLACING MORITA with JACKIE CHAN (WHO DID HIS MANIC BEST to REDEEM HIS EARLIER 2010 BOMB THE SPY NEXT DOOR) MAY PROVE to BE EITHER a STROKE of GENIUS...or JUST ANOTHER CASE of "WHACKS OFF." 

CONTRIBUTING to the SENSE THAT THIS VERSION IS LIKELIER to BE RAZZIE® FODDER THAN OSCAR® BAIT IS THAT IT's HELMED by HARALD ZWART, WHO LAST YEAR NARROWLY ESCAPED a WORST DIRECTOR NOMINATION for the HEINOUS PINK PANTHER, TOO. THEN THERE's the FACT THAT the 1984 ORIGINAL WAS 126 MINUTES (JUST OVER 2 HOURS) and THIS RE-MAKE/RE-HASH IS NEARLY 15 MINUTES LONGER! 

AND, WHETHER THIS NEPOTISTIC "RE-IMAGINING" KICKS ASS or SUCKS ASS, ITs VERY EXISTENCE, in a YEAR WALL-to-WALL with ALARMINGLY UN-ORIGINAL and LAZY HOLLYWOOD PRODUCT, PLAYS RIGHT INTO the RAZZIE® UBER-VIEW of MODERN MOVIE-MAKING as a VAST WASTELAND WHERE EVERYTHING OLD...IS DEJA-VU ALL OVER AGAIN. 



CHAN: "Conficius say, just as lazy man does laundry 
by leaving clothes out in rain, lazy movie-making-man 
does remake instead of bothering  to be original..." 


Ye Olde Head RAZZberry
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BurnHollywoodBurn View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Quote BurnHollywoodBurn Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 30 2010 at 9:27am
So, what decade is this again -- the 2010s or the 1980s? I really can't tell, what with the hundreds of sequels and remakes of movies from 30 years ago!  
The Four Horsemen of the Moviepocalypse: uncalled for sequels/remakes/reboots, 3-D surcharges, untalented "celebrities", and anything with Michael Bay's name attached to it.
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Post Options Post Options   Quote saturnwatcher Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 30 2010 at 10:41am
Maybe we need to exhume Ronnie Reagan and stick him in the White House? Nobody would be able to tell the difference...  
Nine times out of ten, in art as in life, there is no truth to be discovered, only an error to be exposed.--H.L. Menken
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Post Options Post Options   Quote BurnHollywoodBurn Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 30 2010 at 11:29am
Zombie Reagan would probably be just as good a President as the lame duck, sleeping all the time, and reading lines while he was alive Reagan.
The Four Horsemen of the Moviepocalypse: uncalled for sequels/remakes/reboots, 3-D surcharges, untalented "celebrities", and anything with Michael Bay's name attached to it.
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Post Options Post Options   Quote GTAHater767 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 30 2010 at 12:29pm
And maybe we should re-institute old technology like cassette tapes, VHS, analog TV, the Nintendo Entertainment System...you name it.
 
Also, I used to wear...something...until 1995. This thing was made really thick and with plastic back in the 80's. They should make them like that again, if only because we can't tell if it's 198X or 201X anymore.
Possible Unofficial Forums, given <35% approval: Ags. 27; The November Man.
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Post Options Post Options   Quote moviewizguy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 30 2010 at 1:09pm
This looks like a fun movie. I really enjoyed the trailer a lot, so I'll probably end up seeing it, since it's a part of my culture.
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Post Options Post Options   Quote BurnHollywoodBurn Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 30 2010 at 1:33pm
Translation: Of course of I'm going to go see this movie and give it a great review, because I love all movies, and because I have no quality filter.
The Four Horsemen of the Moviepocalypse: uncalled for sequels/remakes/reboots, 3-D surcharges, untalented "celebrities", and anything with Michael Bay's name attached to it.
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Post Options Post Options   Quote BurnHollywoodBurn Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: May 30 2010 at 1:34pm
Hey, why not. I mean if that stuff was popular 30 years ago, why wouldn't it sell nowadays? Right, right ... right? Anyone?  

Originally posted by GTAHater767

And maybe we should re-institute old technology like cassette tapes, VHS, analog TV, the Nintendo Entertainment System...you name it.
The Four Horsemen of the Moviepocalypse: uncalled for sequels/remakes/reboots, 3-D surcharges, untalented "celebrities", and anything with Michael Bay's name attached to it.
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Post Options Post Options   Quote Berrynoia Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: June 01 2010 at 7:18pm
This isn't the only 1980s re-hash coming out on the 11th.  In addition to Karate isn't Kidding, we get to deal with a new A-Team movie, a film based on a series that ran in the...yep, the eighties.

R.I.P. Hollywood Originality, 20--wait a minute, how many times have we declared originality dead in Hollywood?  I am too busy with other things to count them all!
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Post Options Post Options   Quote moviewizguy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: June 04 2010 at 2:42pm
Trust me. This film is going to be good. Early reviews say that it's a worthy remake. I was surprised to learn that the running time is 2 and a half hours. It gives the film more credibility.
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Post Options Post Options   Quote Julianstark Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: June 04 2010 at 3:21pm
While the 2.5 hour running time could be a good thing (if the film is actually good in the first place), it certainly doesn't give the film more credibility. Consider Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen, which actually took home Worst Picture last year.
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Post Options Post Options   Quote BurnHollywoodBurn Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: June 04 2010 at 3:35pm
Trust you, moviewizeguy? Why? You say this exact same thing for every movie that's posted here that you have interest in! And then after you say the "early reviews" are good, hundreds of bad reviews come pouring in.  

Originally posted by moviewizguy

Trust me. This film is going to be good. Early reviews say that it's a worthy remake. I was surprised to learn that the running time is 2 and a half hours. It gives the film more credibility.
The Four Horsemen of the Moviepocalypse: uncalled for sequels/remakes/reboots, 3-D surcharges, untalented "celebrities", and anything with Michael Bay's name attached to it.
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Post Options Post Options   Quote saturnwatcher Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: June 04 2010 at 5:33pm
"Worthy remake"? Can you say oxymoron?  

RESPONSE from Head RAZZberry: Methinks one of the few intentionally/actually funny lines ever spoken by Duh Sly Guy applies here. It's from 1991's OSCAR: "That's an ox...and a moron!" 
Nine times out of ten, in art as in life, there is no truth to be discovered, only an error to be exposed.--H.L. Menken
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Post Options Post Options   Quote wetbandit82 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: June 04 2010 at 9:07pm
Ralph Macchio's already come out and said to avoid it.  If you can't trust him, who can you trust? 
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Post Options Post Options   Quote BurnHollywoodBurn Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: June 05 2010 at 4:30am
OXYMORON! Clap    

Originally posted by saturnwatcher

"Worthy remake"? Can you say oxymoron?
The Four Horsemen of the Moviepocalypse: uncalled for sequels/remakes/reboots, 3-D surcharges, untalented "celebrities", and anything with Michael Bay's name attached to it.
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Post Options Post Options   Quote BurnHollywoodBurn Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: June 05 2010 at 4:33am
The last time an actor bad mouthed the movie adaptation/remake of his old movie/TV series was Robert Conrad from the "Wild, Wild West" series ... and that movie went on to win Worst Picture!
The Four Horsemen of the Moviepocalypse: uncalled for sequels/remakes/reboots, 3-D surcharges, untalented "celebrities", and anything with Michael Bay's name attached to it.
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